Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Taking the heat off the Incompetent

Dear Natascha,

It's not a good week to write this letter, as we are close to the holiday of our Enemy. After all, they need to pass sermons and hymns to celebrate their success against our evil Lord. I always hope that there are no holidays so that we can drive people to overwork and hate their lives.

So, our converted people from the SDP have taken a confrontational front against our minions. The mad woman who we have slowly indoctrinated is now demanding that our barking dogs to produce evidence about her famous "bite". Of course, her poor chinese education did not tell her that if we want to add crimes on them, it's so easy. It's so simple to ensure that they would get more offenses. Proof? Where?

I see that you are trying to get the Home Minister on the good books with the people. But I do not understand why he is making useless speeches on asking policymakers to take risks and be willing to experiment. Did he not know that the Civil Service, one of our unholy trinity, pride on being anal-retentive, bureaucratic, boring and inflexible? They are trained since the beginning to take orders and to take cover so that they would do no maverick. All they are just shells, graduated with the finest degrees from the Ivy Leagues but end up as useless walking machines everyday doing boring work. Did you not see how we waste pretty faces with top degrees to bring foreign guests around in the Economic Development Board like some whores? Of course, how can we have an unfair inquiry on the escape of that terrorist?

Enough of our slaves. I have read with displeasure that the blogosphere is now spreading news about the old and poor people. Did I not tell you that you need to get all these useless old men and women to old folks home or some random hospices where they could not be seen? Now they are lurking all around for our Enemies to start featuring them on the blogs. Of course, with our need to boost our own finances, thanks to the subprime mess in Wall Street, we cannot increase the public assistance fund. Be sure to tell that minister of yours to stone wall on that. Use excuses like "We cannot give money because that would erode our work ethic" such that the other Singaporeans can do nothing but sympathize with these old folks. As long as the rest of the populace are willing to vote us in, we can have our minions paid high salaries and continue our fee and tax hikes whatever we damn hell please.

So, it's not a good Friday to come, and do continue to spin our lies and deceit, spread the word of our Evil Lord and weave more misery for the middle class with rising costs of living.

Ultimately, victory is ours if we savour it.

Hate is the best medicine,
Uncle Screwtape