Dear Natascha, my lovely niece
It has been a long time since I have written to you. While I am busy helping your cousins Rupert and Rufus to deal with the mess created by those investment bankers in Wall Street, I found no pleasure to hear that you are also having a hard time to help the PAP to stay in power under such exceptional difficult financial climate. Of course, the euphemisms that we adapt on the dark side are "challenging" and "fundamentals of the economy are strong".
Of course, I heard that your plans to instigate your minions and call for a general election are derailed with the Merlion getting struck by lightning. With that small geomancy disaster, you told me that the most powerful man in the little red dot was worried that the end of his party's dominance is near. Then it offset your beautiful idea that it is the 50th anniversary for the PAP since they came to power by eliminating another group of men we corrupted, namely, the communists.
In fact, Rufus has just sent me this silly internet link from your number 1 & 2 enemies about a conference held by a woman group called AWARE. It seemed that fundamentalist Christian Right we have converted using subliminal discrimination tactics, has finally engineered a coup d’etat on the liberals and centrists. Being alerted to the news, I quickly did a google search and was perplexed why you have not informed me of such interesting cat fights going on in Singapore. While the Christian Right led by Dr Thio Su Mien and Josie Lau are now fighting the centrist AWARE ex-co coupled with their coalition of the willing: liberal social media, lesbians and gays, we have seen the rule of law falling apart using a microscope on a small feminist organization. It often amused me why those centrist AWARE founders have created a society with weak constitution and election laws that could be hijacked by fundamentalists. In fact, they should be scolding themselves why they did not see some devious pattern at work by our minions (the Christian Right) to engineer a hostile takeover. Of course, I liked the new AWARE exco for masking their intentions to attack the gay and lesbian agenda by telling them that they want to restore AWARE's original purpose which they defined as helping women who are not lesbians with social causes.
So, here's a formula, my niece on how you can milk the AWARE incident to your advantage. First corrupt those women in the liberal wing and let them understand that no matter how democratic the system is at work, it will be hijacked by people from the opposite ideology. All this battle between the Christian Right and the Liberal Lesbians are a reflection of how immature the society are. Let them take arms and you can start justify draconian laws like the Public Order act that is brought up recently by the Law Minister. Of course, not to mention your funny trick of putting a general to run the Ministry of Information, Communication and the Arts. Only by showing how democracy failed with petty tactics from these feminists, you can start justifying why a "good" and "clean" or this poor English phrase "whiter than white" government is required for Singapore. Of course, one more thing, you should always do is to get those mainstream journalists, "That's why we cannot have protests and disagreements because it will lead our country to instability."
I often wondered why the enemies to our Dark Lord never realized that their followers are just a bunch of sheep and hypocritical as much as we are. As least we are shameless to say that we discriminate and do evil to the world, but it never fail to amaze me that the Christian Right in Singapore are showing their dominance and leading their charge to discriminate the gays and lesbians. Let us continue to let the mainstream media to cover the bra wars while you can tell your minions to push policies to "fix" the opposition in the background.