Monday, May 29, 2006

Entrepreneurs are from Uranus, Con-men are from Pluto

Dear Natasha,

How are the darkest days look to you?

Our Evil Lord has commissioned a new initiative known as Remaking SG-Politicking for you in the little red dot. Your new job is to change the strategy on how the ruling party works. The upgrading and defammation strategies used by your predecessor are now useless in present day Singapore. Was it one of the former presidents named Abraham Lincoln said that the dogmas of the past are inadequate for the stormy present? Relying on past technologies of war will lead you to incur heavy casualties, because new and innovative ideas and products will appear to screw up your life, for example, our enemy's launch of Web 2.0 and open-source software. You are different from the rest of the species living in the little red dot. So, don't be a lazy mugger like the rest of them. Otherwise, you become another "social engineered" demon. You need to be entrepreneurial like our Enemy has done with his team.

Our species who serve the dark Lord has been an innovative bunch. We created things such as Ministry of Sound, casinos and Enron shams to demonstrate how Man can fall badly. To counter our evil purposes, our Enemy created a group of humans known as Entrepreneurs. These people are agents of creative destruction. They redefine the landscape of stagnating industry and markets and create new trends such that our past strategies fail. However, no matter how clever our Enemy from the Bright side is, we always have a counter strategy.

The way to counter this so-called entrepreneurship is defined by our 3C's strategy, otherwise known as "Con,(molly)-Coddling and Corrupt". This idea is easy to implement and executive and we have done that pretty well.

1. Con: We sent in a group of morons claiming to be the prophets of entrepreneurship, and then the undecideds become cynical and critical of the entrepreneurship idea. These people are the snake oil men which is claimed by a netzien, Hinly . These people will glorify entrepreneurship and cover the hardships of the trade and seduce those aggressive and sly con-men to find short cuts to make money. You will hear some people debating a useless topic like Can entrepreneurship be taught??

Slowly, we begin to flood the world with uncreative people claiming to be entrepreneurs. Entrepreneurs are supposed to be people who have great vision and makes money based on their vision, and when they succeed, they donate back to the society as claimed by our Enemy. That's where we come in. We destroy the term entrepreneurship by bringing in other silly elements. For example, some stupid idiots begin to claim Buffett, who is a trader an entrepreneur. Did you not hear the boring CEO of Ikea (a miser) is an entrepreneur? How about the best part having a MLM marketer telling others that he is an entrepreneur because he do sales better? Then add in the smoke from Robert T. Kiyosaki about rich dads and poor dads, then anything can be entrepreneurship. So dark the con of Man, that the public begins to see entrepreneurship from its noble ambition to making money.

Even the social entrepreneurs are destroyed by Durai, who claimed to be a social entrepreneur. You see if the public are badly educated on what entrepreneurship is. These conmen will do a good job in disabling its real function.

2. (molly)-Coddle: Someone from the other side has managed to decipher one of our strategies to stop the creation of these entrepreneurs. They realized that we adopted the strategy of molly-coddling idiots to be entrepreneurs. Of course, where else but in Singapore, this strategy applies perfectly. Our perfect approach is the bureaucrats from these organizations like SUMMER and KING. Their job is to be at their core competency, screwing up young entrepreneurs' with their redtape. Afterall, these bureaucrats are just a bunch of scholars educated in our designated learning centres (they did not know that our Evil Lord owns the Ivy League, Ox-bridge and other high powered unis), that's why they are so good at screwing up.

The molly-coddling approach can help to make those students with no entrepreneurial tendencies to be mediocres and cynical. The more cynics you have, the better you are stopping this entrepreneurial movement. Even you have competitions organized by the local universities to promote entrepreneurial education, these cynics will see it as useless. How glad I am to see people like Hinly fell into our trap.

3. Corrupt: The last approach is not to corrupt the ordinary men, but the entrepreneurs. Our dark Lord was once an angel. As the brightest, he fell. Why do you think that your uncle Asmodeus, has done his part in teaching the CEO of Creative to sue Apple? The idea is simple, indulge these entrepreneurs in the practices, soon they will turn ruthless and destructive. Yes, we dress it something called business reason.

The easiest entrepreneurs to corrupt are those young ones in your province, particularly, the Indians and Chinese students who cannot make it to the States and have to come to your province. They want the easy way out and they will take short cuts, and that's why our colleague has managed to destroy South Korea, by starting with their supreme scientist, Hwang Woo Suk and also the china guy with his Han-xin chip. The people are hungry and want to make money fast. The best way is to destroy them by offering more materialism and use them to screw the people in your province by jump ship to US and Europe.

Now that you learn of our evil strategy in dealing with entrepreneurs? Are you motivated to con, coddle and corrupt an entrepreneur?

Lastly, you should spend more time with that midget who dropped by last week. Perhaps, she should join us, and we will destroy our Enemy.

No matter what, you are always in my thoughts

With eternal hate,
Lived Nomed

Friday, May 19, 2006

To Kill The Mocking Bird

Dear Natasha,

Good tidings you have brought to your uncle last week. The ruling party has once again controlled the Singaporean parliament. As Lord Acton once put so well, "Power corrupts and absolutely power corrupts absolutely." I see that you whisper into the ears of the older politicians that they must use all their might to crush the opposition. The people has once again succumb to materialism. The greed of man, as you will know by now, is our most powerful weapon to seduce the common folk to the dark side. As our evil Lord said in his doctrine that if you cannot crush them, fix them. So, James Gomez was a casualty of our war.

Your only little mistake is with the PM speaking in City Hall. How can you suggest the words of "fix"? It should have been "manage". That could cost us the loss of more people to join the other side, otherwise, known as the Bright Side. Although you have recently revised some of the language to "manage" and "control", I am sure that Freudian slips are often not with the weakest of the man, but also the strongest of the demons.

Now, the forces of the Enemy have not ended their struggle. They usually don't do much after the elections. Now they have begun their crusade against the mainstream media. From your letters, you told me that they are beginning to ease their control over the people. Freedom is on the march for the netizens. It is not in our interest to allow the internet to gain an alternative channel to fight against our propaganda. We have to crush them. These sad and unfortunate netizens have always prided upon large turnouts in rallies and their call for freedom of speech. Freedom of speech is a dumb construct of our Enemy. He has let Man speak too much that they disobeyed and betrayed him to the cross.

Your little trick to get the new ruling party backbencher to condemn the internet as being too negative to the ruling party has worked. Immediately, you see the bloggers has risen to the crusade to this poor little hag. Continue to fan the fires and get the bloggers to crucify the woman.

The way to greater evil is by polarisation and not by moderate views. Look at how your other uncle Asmodeus, lord of the Seven Hells have done to the American President. With his consistent suggestions to Karl, he has garnered a pre-emptive war in modern day. The same is here. The continual attacks from the bloggers will continue the divide rather than heal it. I was appalled that James Gomez did not retailiate to the snipes of the Minister Mentor. It seems that our Enemy has done well with the opposition, teaching them the art of forgive and forget.

My last and final word for today is the little con job that you got NUS to do. So dark the con of NUS.

My thoughts are with you my niece, and luckily you are still a small midget like Gayle.

love always,
Uncle Lived Nomed

Monday, May 01, 2006

Singapore Elections 2006

Dear Natasha,

You are always in my thoughts, my young one. While we rejoice at the promotion of evil and power around you in your province, I was pretty impressed by your attempt to convert Xiaxue into a Sarong Party Girl. All it took was to put a beautiful caucasian boy right beside her, and there was the spark. She did not know that you shot her with the arrow of Eros. That was marvellous but there are greater issues in our hands.

The Singapore election 2006 has been the talk of the town. It was the time where you have to show to our dark lord that your evil prowess is growing at light speed. The political landscape here is barren and boring, with the one party rule pervading all parts of this little red dot. As we, the dark ones, have preached the Machiavellian ideas to the lords and princes, we are still in the league to shape politics in southeast Asia. The dictators rule will mean more evil generated and that is what we are here to do. Politics is a marketplace of interests and not an marketplace of morals. Yet, they did not know that it was the work of your elder brother who was posted there since the day of independence. So dark was the con of man, he had demonstrated how benevolent dictatorship could be translated into a vibrant "First Wold" city. With his brilliant machinations, the ruling party has adopted the following tricks to destroy her opposition: pork barrel politics, gerrymandering, character assassinations, GRCs (that was a brilliant invention on his part) and heavy power hard and high on casinos and national kidney foundation. You did not know that he was responsible in turning T. T. Durai from a harmless evangelist into a darklord that would cheat the peasants off their cash.

But you must do more and this is what my recommendations to you are for this election. As of always, your job is to ensure the ruling party stays in power. Create the lightning to break the anvil of the hammer, my dark youngling. Here are my recommendations to help you so that you can secure their stronghold against the opposition:

1. The Weakest Link: Destroy the weakest link in Aijunied GRC on the opposition end. Continue to prod your minions of the ruling party to call for inquiries and resignation on their opponent's ends. Then use their media influence to continue painting that moron who cannot fill up forms properly to be untrusted and unreliable. He will be perceived to be a liar and a fool. They did not know that you stole the minority forms and made them forgot about the bureaucratic traps in the last elections so that they could not take part.

2. Self praise is not self-disgrace: Continue to boast about the ruling party's achievements. Afterall, their opponents have no people to negotiate FTAs. They did not know that FTAs is our dark Lord's creation to increase the amount of poverty and exploitation in the world. Whisper the words of "First World Government", "Opposition is weak", "Leave no man behind" into the ruler's mind, they would crush the opposition in sight.

3. Continue the upgrading: Men are all selfish and pragmatic creatures. If we continue to bribe them, they will continue to do our bidding. Make sure that you tell the proposition leaders to continue using upgrading as a carrot. The people in Singapore are all cowards and we have to exploit that. We can exploit that to create increased healthcare costs, lower the wages of the workers so that we can treat them as peasants and we can destroy the economy whenever we feel like it, like SARS, NKF and casinos.

My thoughts are of such that I think that you have enough to work for the week. But make no mistake, either the opposition is with us or the opposition is against us. Remember, remember, the sixth of May, our minions will be returned in power, and there will be no stoppage in our great Lord's work.

your lovable Uncle,
Nomed Lived