Monday, May 29, 2006

Entrepreneurs are from Uranus, Con-men are from Pluto

Dear Natasha,

How are the darkest days look to you?

Our Evil Lord has commissioned a new initiative known as Remaking SG-Politicking for you in the little red dot. Your new job is to change the strategy on how the ruling party works. The upgrading and defammation strategies used by your predecessor are now useless in present day Singapore. Was it one of the former presidents named Abraham Lincoln said that the dogmas of the past are inadequate for the stormy present? Relying on past technologies of war will lead you to incur heavy casualties, because new and innovative ideas and products will appear to screw up your life, for example, our enemy's launch of Web 2.0 and open-source software. You are different from the rest of the species living in the little red dot. So, don't be a lazy mugger like the rest of them. Otherwise, you become another "social engineered" demon. You need to be entrepreneurial like our Enemy has done with his team.

Our species who serve the dark Lord has been an innovative bunch. We created things such as Ministry of Sound, casinos and Enron shams to demonstrate how Man can fall badly. To counter our evil purposes, our Enemy created a group of humans known as Entrepreneurs. These people are agents of creative destruction. They redefine the landscape of stagnating industry and markets and create new trends such that our past strategies fail. However, no matter how clever our Enemy from the Bright side is, we always have a counter strategy.

The way to counter this so-called entrepreneurship is defined by our 3C's strategy, otherwise known as "Con,(molly)-Coddling and Corrupt". This idea is easy to implement and executive and we have done that pretty well.

1. Con: We sent in a group of morons claiming to be the prophets of entrepreneurship, and then the undecideds become cynical and critical of the entrepreneurship idea. These people are the snake oil men which is claimed by a netzien, Hinly . These people will glorify entrepreneurship and cover the hardships of the trade and seduce those aggressive and sly con-men to find short cuts to make money. You will hear some people debating a useless topic like Can entrepreneurship be taught??

Slowly, we begin to flood the world with uncreative people claiming to be entrepreneurs. Entrepreneurs are supposed to be people who have great vision and makes money based on their vision, and when they succeed, they donate back to the society as claimed by our Enemy. That's where we come in. We destroy the term entrepreneurship by bringing in other silly elements. For example, some stupid idiots begin to claim Buffett, who is a trader an entrepreneur. Did you not hear the boring CEO of Ikea (a miser) is an entrepreneur? How about the best part having a MLM marketer telling others that he is an entrepreneur because he do sales better? Then add in the smoke from Robert T. Kiyosaki about rich dads and poor dads, then anything can be entrepreneurship. So dark the con of Man, that the public begins to see entrepreneurship from its noble ambition to making money.

Even the social entrepreneurs are destroyed by Durai, who claimed to be a social entrepreneur. You see if the public are badly educated on what entrepreneurship is. These conmen will do a good job in disabling its real function.

2. (molly)-Coddle: Someone from the other side has managed to decipher one of our strategies to stop the creation of these entrepreneurs. They realized that we adopted the strategy of molly-coddling idiots to be entrepreneurs. Of course, where else but in Singapore, this strategy applies perfectly. Our perfect approach is the bureaucrats from these organizations like SUMMER and KING. Their job is to be at their core competency, screwing up young entrepreneurs' with their redtape. Afterall, these bureaucrats are just a bunch of scholars educated in our designated learning centres (they did not know that our Evil Lord owns the Ivy League, Ox-bridge and other high powered unis), that's why they are so good at screwing up.

The molly-coddling approach can help to make those students with no entrepreneurial tendencies to be mediocres and cynical. The more cynics you have, the better you are stopping this entrepreneurial movement. Even you have competitions organized by the local universities to promote entrepreneurial education, these cynics will see it as useless. How glad I am to see people like Hinly fell into our trap.

3. Corrupt: The last approach is not to corrupt the ordinary men, but the entrepreneurs. Our dark Lord was once an angel. As the brightest, he fell. Why do you think that your uncle Asmodeus, has done his part in teaching the CEO of Creative to sue Apple? The idea is simple, indulge these entrepreneurs in the practices, soon they will turn ruthless and destructive. Yes, we dress it something called business reason.

The easiest entrepreneurs to corrupt are those young ones in your province, particularly, the Indians and Chinese students who cannot make it to the States and have to come to your province. They want the easy way out and they will take short cuts, and that's why our colleague has managed to destroy South Korea, by starting with their supreme scientist, Hwang Woo Suk and also the china guy with his Han-xin chip. The people are hungry and want to make money fast. The best way is to destroy them by offering more materialism and use them to screw the people in your province by jump ship to US and Europe.

Now that you learn of our evil strategy in dealing with entrepreneurs? Are you motivated to con, coddle and corrupt an entrepreneur?

Lastly, you should spend more time with that midget who dropped by last week. Perhaps, she should join us, and we will destroy our Enemy.

No matter what, you are always in my thoughts


With eternal hate,
Lived Nomed
Finland

3 comments:

visceral said...

I didnt know hate could be eternal

The Oriental Express said...

My dear uncle, Did you get interviewed too?

Lived Nomed said...

Well, I did not. :)