Dear Natascha,
You should not have awaken me with this latest email of yours. The notification bell on my blackberry (with the Microsoft Exchange) has been ringing so loud that I have to get out of my bed to see what it's going on. After reading the contents of your email, I realize that the other group who we control: the SDP gang is out on the mischief against the establishment (which we also control). It must be a pain for you to control two groups of people who are directly in conflict. Of course, both sides don't realize that they have fallen to our side. What the hell, a video fiasco again!
Originally, I am aware that you corrupted Chee Soon Juan and his bunch of SDP democrats to do stupid things such that the whole opposition loses credibility. However, they are getting more and more out of hand lately. I am wondering how the Media Development Authority got wind of the event that they are publicizing the political video "One Nation Under Lee". Let me make a guess, the hotel hosting the event (with those cowardly Singaporeans trying to cover their backside as usual) or some spies planted by the PAP who kept their movement in check for 24 hours.
The problem is the following. You have to start telling your minions in PAP to stop patronizing these idiots. As we have started to exploit the Internet for our purposes especially in promoting sex, drugs, pornography and violence, we have also discovered best practices in handling Internet content before it blew out of proportion.
First of all, your minions in PAP make the mistake of being filmed by those jokers of yours in SDP. By filming coupled with selective editing, your SDP cronies can make your PAP cronies look like those North Korean Secret Police force. I pity those three MDA officials you sent. They have become overnight stars in the Internet. I wonder if any anti-establishment people like taxi drivers have cursed them in public. Next time, you want to send them to pick up DVDs of banned political films, use the police to snatch all filming equipment. If those SDP goons use a mobile phone as a last ditch, their videos would be of bad quality and the public would not be able to make any sense of what has transpired. By giving those idiots so clear coverage, you are making the public more curious and sympathetic to the cause of these bunch of mad people.
Second, you are wasting time to bust these small events. The SDP gathering reminds me of a bunch of scientologists having some cultic practices about Ron Hubbard's silly drug theories. Let's deconstruct what the SDP gathering event is about. Understand that the SDP goons will invite those who are already converted to their cause. How many of them are there? Less than 50. There is a total of 4.6M people in Singapore. Divide that number, and you realize that it is insignificant to create a tipping point for them to convert the rest of them. Do you think that the typical 5C chasing Singaporean will be interested in what the opposition already say? By giving attention to these idiots when they have film launches, your minions in PAP are spurring more people to go to YouTube or Google Video and view the video "One Nation Under Lee".
Third, even if the video is online and would be spread to more people, who will be watching it? Remember only 30-40% of Singapore are English educated. There is a significant amount of people who don't even know what GIC is. Those English educated Singaporeans are so scared of the ISD that they would still vote for the PAP. Then, if you go to the next group of people, who are the bunch of Singaporeans who only speak Holkien and broken English, do you think that they can withstand Chee Soon Juan's flowery grammar and bombastic vocabulary? Sometimes, I wonder how you whisper to the Old Man about crushing his opposition. Defammation suits would be allowed. In fact, since the video is out in the open, call the lawyers and sue them until their pants dropped. I will overlook this fiasco out of my sympathy that the Old Man's wife is now in serious condition out there. Please send my best wishes to them.
Next time, if something like this happen, just take your time and send it to me in the morning UK time.
Corrupting the Bright Side of Life,
Uncle Screwtape
