Dear Natascha,
I have read your past few emails with interest. Ever since the bombshell of giving opposition more voice dropped into the blogosphere, you have effectively divided the opposition parties once again. Even if you have not given them that 20% parliament seats for more "voice" (or more loud hailers of course), they would still be in disarray. Don't these morons ever learn that the only day where they can wrestle control from our minions is the day when they can consistently speak in one proper voice and not sending mixed messages to the electorate?
You may think that this letter was sent to commend on your recent performances, particularly, those PR stunts you have been pulling off with the Old Man heading to Malaysia and visit friends (with all those hidden agendas to promote our Evil Lord's work) and the "holy" Goh visiting Myanmar to fake how concerned ASEAN are on their case to prosecute that politician (who they held hostage for the longest time). Event PM Lee's hypocritical statements of humility have made me laughed. It does not help when I see those who are attacking our minions bridging Animal Farm to be relevant to Singapore's current situation.
Instead, I am writing this letter to admonish you for the bad PR work you have been doing with Temasek. After all, Temasek is one of our Lord's money making machines. Your poor attempts to mask losses (given our Enemy controlled the liberal western media) have illustrated how incompetent our minions are in managing shit loads of money. You need to step up efforts not to let the peasants in Singapore to get hold of international news. Every time when the Financial Times and BBC throw up some articles about us losing money, your minions did not come up with good answers. Instead they made silly mistakes and it's making us a laughing stock to our Enemy who did not need a lot of effort to show the people that we are losing money. I will suggest that you take serious steps to push our minions to pay more and get good PR.
One last thing before I dropped my pen, you should probably think of way to move Lee Bee Wah out of the STTA job. She has been an eyesore and she seemed to have incur some wrath from the populace. It will be good to make sure that we have no stones unturned by the next election.
Your hate is my love,
Uncle Screwtape
