Dear Natascha,
It has been a while since we have corresponded with each other. Our evil Lord has been working on several new initiatives to torment our enemy. We started with the subprime mortgage crisis, followed by the Lehmann meltdown and now the swine flu (H1N1 virus). Of course, engineering crises are a forte in my department. It helps to steer our minions in good light.
Your crisis management of the AWARE saga have been well taken by our Lord. Both the corrupted Christian Right and the secular militants (led by the gays and lesbians) have now engaged in a clear war with events like Pink Dot, the smearing of Siew Kum Hong NMP and the many back and forth between the supporters of the Feminist Mentor including Thio Li Ann. Our gains are from their constant war. As long as you are constantly fanning fires between the homosexuals and the Christian Right on both fronts, these activists from both sides of the House will fall in our hands at some point without them realizing it. Don't you think that it's so ironic? By committing the dishonourable deeds of poison pen and manufacturing smears on Siew Kum Hong, those Christians (who are now servants of our Dark Lord) are deviating away from our Enemy's teachings of being compassionate and humane. They did not realize that we have infused into them the corrupted way to re-interpret that stupid book provided by our Enemy. Similarly, the gays and lesbians will be drawn to our evil world with the constant attack of being discriminated. It's a war that never ends.
It looks like that the recent freak results in the Malaysian and US elections have alerted you to do some work on your minions front. The new announcements from the Prime Minister of Singapore on tweaking the political system have been wonderful, if not strategic. Yet, I believed that you have stolen from my playbook - the strategy of containment by providing a space for manufactured dissent. If the numbers are always 99% PAP and 1% opposition, the voters will constantly be locked to take extreme actions such that they might provide a freak result and vote our minions out.
By using this new idea of (1) increasing 9 to 12 single constituencies, (2) lowering the number of 6 member GRCs and (3) increasing the number of NCMPs to 20, your minions have effectively contained the victory for the next election. Honestly, it took you take long to convince that old man that it is better to treat the symptoms for a lacklustre and toothless opposition. After what's the difference between 82-2 and 64-20 in the layout of PAP and opposition members? In any argument, our minions will still win. That's the key - winning. We want to win the vote to allow our minions to run the Government linked Corporations and the sovereign wealth funds such as GIC and Temasek without any interference. The absolute numbers of increasing opposition does not matter anymore. A nice cosmetic change to bring the number to 20% of the parliament just give the Opposition to make more stupid mistakes. In fact, the stupid voters will now see our minions in positive light and continuing doing what they do best - sitting on the fence. I will suggest that you get more lawyers on your side for defamation suits, justify the Public Order Act and Political Films Act and make sure that power corrupts the opposition in Parliament. It's a beautiful trap that I am already smiling for our future.
You will update me more on your progress with our minions. I look forward to good news ahead.
In eternal Evil,
Uncle Screwtape
Showing posts with label Opposition. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Opposition. Show all posts
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Fixing the Opposition "Consistently"
Dear Natascha,
I read your emails on my blackberry with displeasure. It seems that your cronies are still making silly mistakes now and then. I was surprised that they are learning the flip-flopping nature of John Kerry, particularly on charging that blogger by the name of Gopalan Nair. The worst is that you are not banning blogger while letting him rant like a mad dog. Once again, you need to unleash our allies like Lucky Tan to deliver us from good.
For a start, you need to teach your cronies how to fix their enemies consistently so that the common people are afraid. Let's do some market research as a start. We can do an assessment of the four opposition leaders with what this blogger has written. Another blogger also told us how he feels about the four opposition leaders. Actually, to us, it's good that these four holds a seperate domain because it is easy to tear them apart when they are seperate. First of all, let's look at CST, he's getting old and thanks to our mole and his protege CSJ, he has given up but holding to a small turf. He has no more will and soon Potong Pasir will turn to us again. Second, JBJ is also old, and both CST and him are still fighting with old man over who's right or wrong. Their only reason for losing in the longer run is because unlike the old man, they have no successors or any young people who want to join their cause. That's why you have done the smartest thing by sending our top cronies to Harvard Business School so that they understand what institutional memory and leadership succession mean. So far, our Enemy has picked this group to be our adversary. Still they got loose cannons or should I called them politically inept morons like Goh Meng Seng and Chia Ti Lik who would make the opposition plight worse by being impatient.
My advice is to be consistent in the way you fix the opposition. Of course, with the powerful legislative apparatus you provided the old man and his motley crew, you can ensure these opposition leaders with lawsuits that would drive the young people away. After young Singaporeans are not like the young Americans, they would not dare to go out and vote a Obama. The young Singaporeans would hide or have no backbone to reject the poison pills (or scholarships) we prepare for them. The threat is disabled easily for these young people. As long as those talented Singaporeans are in our radar as civil servants, we don't need to worry anymore because we controlled their livelihood.
That comes to my final point. Even if we ever manage to send the Chee siblings to the asylum, we still have monkeys decrying on our enemies with the label of "approved opposition". Those monkeys don't realize that the key to beat us is to have these moderates who can take over when our cronies lose power. So, we are forever unbeatable because the opposition behave like those silly liberal democrats who got themselves screwed with party unity hitting into the dustbin.
So, we should rejoice in the word of our Evil Lord,
Uncle Screwtape
I read your emails on my blackberry with displeasure. It seems that your cronies are still making silly mistakes now and then. I was surprised that they are learning the flip-flopping nature of John Kerry, particularly on charging that blogger by the name of Gopalan Nair. The worst is that you are not banning blogger while letting him rant like a mad dog. Once again, you need to unleash our allies like Lucky Tan to deliver us from good.
For a start, you need to teach your cronies how to fix their enemies consistently so that the common people are afraid. Let's do some market research as a start. We can do an assessment of the four opposition leaders with what this blogger has written. Another blogger also told us how he feels about the four opposition leaders. Actually, to us, it's good that these four holds a seperate domain because it is easy to tear them apart when they are seperate. First of all, let's look at CST, he's getting old and thanks to our mole and his protege CSJ, he has given up but holding to a small turf. He has no more will and soon Potong Pasir will turn to us again. Second, JBJ is also old, and both CST and him are still fighting with old man over who's right or wrong. Their only reason for losing in the longer run is because unlike the old man, they have no successors or any young people who want to join their cause. That's why you have done the smartest thing by sending our top cronies to Harvard Business School so that they understand what institutional memory and leadership succession mean. So far, our Enemy has picked this group to be our adversary. Still they got loose cannons or should I called them politically inept morons like Goh Meng Seng and Chia Ti Lik who would make the opposition plight worse by being impatient.
My advice is to be consistent in the way you fix the opposition. Of course, with the powerful legislative apparatus you provided the old man and his motley crew, you can ensure these opposition leaders with lawsuits that would drive the young people away. After young Singaporeans are not like the young Americans, they would not dare to go out and vote a Obama. The young Singaporeans would hide or have no backbone to reject the poison pills (or scholarships) we prepare for them. The threat is disabled easily for these young people. As long as those talented Singaporeans are in our radar as civil servants, we don't need to worry anymore because we controlled their livelihood.
That comes to my final point. Even if we ever manage to send the Chee siblings to the asylum, we still have monkeys decrying on our enemies with the label of "approved opposition". Those monkeys don't realize that the key to beat us is to have these moderates who can take over when our cronies lose power. So, we are forever unbeatable because the opposition behave like those silly liberal democrats who got themselves screwed with party unity hitting into the dustbin.
So, we should rejoice in the word of our Evil Lord,
Uncle Screwtape
Sunday, March 09, 2008
Mapping out the Strategy for the next General Elections 2011
Dear Natascha,
I called your cousin Natalia yesterday and gave her a dressing down, as instructed by our Evil dark Lord. I cannot believe that she has made a big mess with the Malaysian General Elections held last Saturday. How can the political landscape in Malaysia changed within one night? I am disappointed that our minions in Barisan Nationalis have lost two thirds of the majority for a ruling coalition and now even our ex-minion Dr Mahatir has lashed out at his own successor, asking him to step down. I know why he did that, because he has always wanted Najib. Thanks to the Malay voters, who decided that they had enough with the UMNO, they have changed sides for the first time, and gave us the perfect storm which caused us to lose our turf in Malaysia.
The reason why I wrote to you, is because I have started to see some bloggers like this one (who keeps calling himself Dr) in Singapore starting to use this as an incident to revolt against our minions here in Singapore. You know the consequences, my dear niece. Should we got a GRC lost in the next Singapore General Elections 2011, I fear that my Lord would punish you with eternal pain. In Malaysia, I heard that the bloggers who had contested for the general election like that one called Jeff Ooi (who Natalie failed to silence). So, I urge you to stop being complacent like that useless Minister of Home Affairs and start bouncing back for the coming times.
Here are some strategies which I would like you to start executing:
Your Evil Uncle,
Screwtape
I called your cousin Natalia yesterday and gave her a dressing down, as instructed by our Evil dark Lord. I cannot believe that she has made a big mess with the Malaysian General Elections held last Saturday. How can the political landscape in Malaysia changed within one night? I am disappointed that our minions in Barisan Nationalis have lost two thirds of the majority for a ruling coalition and now even our ex-minion Dr Mahatir has lashed out at his own successor, asking him to step down. I know why he did that, because he has always wanted Najib. Thanks to the Malay voters, who decided that they had enough with the UMNO, they have changed sides for the first time, and gave us the perfect storm which caused us to lose our turf in Malaysia.
The reason why I wrote to you, is because I have started to see some bloggers like this one (who keeps calling himself Dr) in Singapore starting to use this as an incident to revolt against our minions here in Singapore. You know the consequences, my dear niece. Should we got a GRC lost in the next Singapore General Elections 2011, I fear that my Lord would punish you with eternal pain. In Malaysia, I heard that the bloggers who had contested for the general election like that one called Jeff Ooi (who Natalie failed to silence). So, I urge you to stop being complacent like that useless Minister of Home Affairs and start bouncing back for the coming times.
Here are some strategies which I would like you to start executing:
- Putting Legislation and Regulation on New Media: Start the registration act, and ostracize the bloggers. I am not so worried about bloggers like Catherine Lim, Mr Brown, Dr Huang, Mr Wang and even those fellas in The Online Citizen joining the opposition and starting to contest elections. Given past history, they are gutless and fearful of losing their well-endowed lives and become like Chee Soon Juan and JBJ. In fact, if any blogger tries to do a Jeff Ooi, we would make sure that our defamation lawsuits and dirty political tactics (fearmongering, gerrymandering and pork barrel politics to bribe the grassroots and useless peasants) would prevail. You must start to tell your minion to drop the light touch approach and throw a heavy hand. Also start co-opting some bloggers to the Dark Side, for example, Kway Teow Man and Bart since they talked like the government's mouthpiece.
- Make sure the GRC boundaries are properly drawn: Be sure that the electoral map must be made in the advantage of the PAP. Make sure this time for Aijunied, please carve a bigger part from Marine Parade such that Goh would have 66.6% of the popular vote, while George Yeo would hit 60% of the popular vote too!
- Give more "ang-pows" to the people like the God of Fortune: Of course, this year, that Indian Finance minsiter in the government is now handing out money again to bribe the populace. Of course, we can always introduce stealth taxes in transport and also start to tighten our grassroots people. You need to start getting smarter Yes-men, and not those who would go and invest the town council funds into stock markets. Of course, you must give away more money to look poor, so that the people have forgotten about how rich our sovereign wealth funds: Temasek and GIC are. From now to 2011, start having GSToffset, tax rebates and Progress packages for Singaporeans every year. Buying their loyalty needs slow bribery of three years.
- Fire those incumbent and incompetent ministers in the name of leadership transition: That prime minister has already indicated that he need to get the 4th generation leadership in place. It is time to fire the old and dead wood. I do think that the old man is becoming a liability. Of course, you do not know what the double faced SM Goh is doing. I am afraid that he might do a Mahatir on his successor. First thing first, fire that useless Minister of Home Affairs.
Your Evil Uncle,
Screwtape
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